Headaches and Sex

As I write this, post coital, the pain throbs in my heads. Blood rushing through my veins and pounding against my temples with every heartbeat.

I’ve suffered with NDPH (New Daily Persistent Headaches) and Transformed Migraines for the past 15 years, I’ve learned to live with the pain and to get on with my life, so if I were to stay true to the ‘Can we not have sex… I have a headache‘ I would never get laid. This is my personal story between headaches and sex and what I’ve learned throughout my experience.

The type of headaches I suffer with mean that I have a headache everyday. I wake up with a headache, and go to sleep with a headache. There will be points in the day, week or month that the headaches are worse on the pain scale, often peaking so high that I need stop whatever I’m doing and relax or sleep for a while. However, this doesn’t happen often because I don’t let it, I hate not doing anything just because I have a headache, mainly because if I’m left with my own company for too long I start to think about the pain, maybe cry a little which in turn makes it worse. I prefer to keep myself preoccupied with work, going out or doing my artwork and writing so my brain doesn’t have too long to think about the pain throbbing inside.

Sex for me is a brief distraction from the headaches, when I’m in the throes of passion the pain disappears, I can relax and enjoy the experience. Sometimes after – depending on how bad the headache was to begin with – the pain will lessen. Sex is often the best pain reliever. However, on other occasions it can make it 10 times worse, as the post-orgasm bliss wears off, the blood flowing around the body hits my head and with every pump of my heart I can feel it against my skull. As the blood pressure slows down to a normal pace, I’m left with a dull ache over my head and into the neck that’ll stay there until the next day.

The list of painkillers I’ve tried goes on to several pages, all with little to no effect. Sometimes the side effects of a pill is much worse than the pain of a headache. There has only been a handful of times I’ve turned down sex due to a headache and this is because the pain was so unbearable I literally could not move from the foetal position without throwing up.

I’ve heard my friends say before “We didn’t have sex because I had a headache” and I can’t help but roll my eyes. Yes – I’m comparing my life of headache to theres and admit I don’t have much sympathy for those with a slight pain in their head. I think if you can walk home from work or cook dinner you can have sex. The headache would simply be an excuse for you not wanting to have sex with your partner. (Unless it is a migraine or cluster headache etc, which are super painful)

So my advice? If you have an annoying tension headache that’s been there all day – maybe a good sex session or even a cheeky wank will work wonders and relax you enough to help the headache disappear. If you have a crippling headache that hurts to open your eyes then maybe give it a swerve, or take some painkillers to numb it enough to have a go. I understand that sometimes you don’t feel sexy enough when you’re in pain to have sex, but studies has shown that an orgasm is a brilliant pain killer – whether it’s a headache or pain in your knee. So give it a go – what’s the worse that could happen!

So, “Does sex help headaches?” Let me know your experiences in the comment below.



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